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i read through about 10 or so pages of the rest of this section of the forum here and found one reference to something that sound similar to what i want to do, but it didn't seem to work. it suggested to change
admin menu-->sytem admin--->preferences--->general settings--->Default Comment Display Mode to threaded...however i think that's just for comments, not replies...so it didn't solve my problem...i also noticed that at the top of the threads you'll see a "flat" link that'll change it to what i want...i'm just wondering if there's an automatic way of setting it