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Just to not be rude and not post, I found the solution to my problem using some rather drastic measures.
I loaded up the block's information from the block_instance table in phpmyadmin and copied only the PHP code into an external editor. Sure enough, in the editor I could see that my escape characters themselves were not being escaped for storage my MySQL.
In another words, the strings were being stored in MySQL with the format:
printf("<table align=\"right\">\n");
Instead of the necessary:
printf("<table align=\\"right\\">\\n");
So I manually edited the files to escape the necesary characters, changed the character count variable, and poof. It worked. I'm sure this does not help with most of the other individual's problems on here, but this helped my specific problem.