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I don't think its that, I think its this sitemap 1.25 from peak XOOPS I have turned off protector and the problems still exist, my initial assumptions must have been wrong and i can only assume something in sitemap is hogging the site.
Of course it may be the hosts but they reckon its me.
There are only two new modules on both sites, I have installed a couple of other things but they are different on each site (and both sites go down)
the two modules are sitemap 1.25
and protector 2.55
I have managed to disable protector before the site went down again, I can on ly assume its site map or the host